A recent study reveals that individuals in consensually non-monogamous relationships experience less jealousy compared to those in monogamous ones. Despite this, feeling less desirable than a partner triggers similar stress across both relationship types. These findings, published in Evolution and Human Behavior, explore the concept known as mate value discrepancy (MVD). MVD refers to the perceived gap in attractiveness, intelligence, or success between partners.
Examining Mate Value Discrepancy
In monogamous relationships, feeling mismatched with a partner often leads to insecurity and tension. The new research investigates if this pattern holds true for non-exclusive relationships like polyamory or open arrangements. Researchers surveyed 512 participants from 62 countries, with 312 in monogamous relationships and 200 in consensually non-monogamous relationships.
How the Study Was Conducted
Participants answered questions about themselves and up to two partners, assessing their own value and how they managed jealousy and conflicts. The study used psychological measures to evaluate mate value, mate guarding, and relationship maintenance.
Impact of Feeling Less Desirable
Across both relationship types, individuals feeling replaceable reported more frequent conflicts and rivalries with others of the same sex. This aligns with earlier research on monogamous couples. Feeling less desirable can heighten insecurities and potentially lead to jealousy or controlling behavior.
In non-monogamous relationships, the dynamic shifted with secondary partners. Here, feeling more desirable than a secondary partner could lead to conflicts and rivalry, contrasting with reactions involving primary partners.
Role of Communication and Hierarchy
Overall, non-monogamous participants reported less jealousy, mate guarding, and rivalry. Effective communication—particularly open discussions about attraction and jealousy—was crucial in reducing relationship problems. In non-monogamous relationships, feeling happy about a partner’s intimacy with others was beneficial. In contrast, ranking partners into a hierarchy often led to increased jealousy, rivalry, and resentment.
Researchers highlight that non-monogamy doesn’t inherently eliminate jealousy. Those in such relationships were not more susceptible to the impact of perceived desirability mismatches, nor were they more resilient. Most research focuses on monogamous couples due to cultural norms. These findings offer new insights for counselors and educators addressing challenges in diverse relationship structures.
Reference: Swanson, F. L., et al. (2026). How perceived mate value discrepancies are related to jealousy, mate guarding, intrasexual competition, and partner conflict in monogamous and consensually non-monogamous relationships. Evolution and Human Behavior. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.evolhumbehav.2026.106936.
Contact Newsweek editors on this story: Kara Dolman and Emma Lee-Sang.
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